Friction

For the past 1 1/2 years, I have lived with my dad- and consequently with several roommates, as he has rented the house out for sometime to bring in extra income. At first everything was cool, got along with everyone great- but eventually relations turned sour. For the longest time I blamed this and blamed that- assuming that the reason involved specific people. But as it turned out- those were just excuses to fill the gap, and I too had become guilty of scapegoating. But it was not until today that I realized this. It's quite surprising that I had failed to realize it, considering it was the same experience at all 4 group homes I had lived in for that past 3 years, as well as high school. The problem is one that, as I would have been surprised to know, no one is exempt from- and that is: Everyone eventually gets tired of each other. Now I'm not saying this necessarily always applies- but I believe it enough that I would bet a good $1000 that even two lovers would grow to loathe each other's presence if locked in a cramped closet for a year. Well, that's an extreme example, but should serve to prove my point. Everyone needs space, although until last night I failed to recognize that. I even listed myself on a test as able to tolerate infinite affection. Maybe I actually can, but I shouldn't make such judgments unless I am sure of it.

This inevitable friction found in relationships of all kinds- should be taken into consideration. It's understandable that it should be so widespread- since friction as a principle exists in the physical world. On that note- I will make use of the associated analogy- enough friction will eventually cause deterioration, decomposition, and destruction- as well as ignite wildfires. the most extreme example I could find of the affects of friction is the real world is a Nuclear Chain Reaction, although I believe in "The Big Bang" so that would be the most extreme period- although apparently unlike most extreme examples of friction the effects were positive.

Before I get on a tangent though- I would like to note that these analogies are an excellent metaphorical mirror of the affects of psychological friction. As such, one of the keys to keeping relationships healthy is to closely monitor the friction in your relationships. By doing so you will prevent any friction-related problems from occurring. As with adaptation the key is maintaining a balance. I suppose on that note balance is vital to all aspects of any type of relationship, so we should dedicate ourselves to monitoring and maintaining this balance between ourselves and those we hold dear. But especially in relation to friction, I should make sure to limit the time I spend with anyone I know- to prevent wearing out my welcome. To be frank, few people renting at my dad's house "have a life", and so the constant chaos is understandable, since most of them spend 100% of their free time at all (that's an exact percentage), and over half don't work at all- which of course means they never leave the house in the first place. But I should do my part and get something more of "a life' starting with college and some volunteer work (see "Volunteer" post)