Patronized

I have just uncovered a new quality about myself. Actually, it's something I've been trying to figure out for a while now. See- for the last 6-8 months or so, I have rarely every gotten angry. The reason for this is explained in past articles, particularly in "The Importance Of Relativity". However, there are certain situations that I cannot help raising my voice or using intense verbal tones in, or, in the case of chatting online, writing in such a way that my anger leaks out This was all very confusing, because I could not pinpoint why I was angry all these times. All I knew is the their words pushed my buttons, I did not know why.

After all, if I maintain a perspective where everyone has reason for their actions, I would have no reason to blame them for their words. And, because their words need not affect or change who I am, the words affecting my self esteem is not possible. So, since my self esteem is not affected, and I do not blame them, why am I angry?

Today, I was feeling angry due to this kind of circumstance, but this time I was able to discover the reason for my anger- which button(s) they pushed.

It all lies in a quality that I myself failed to notice- and that is that I hate being patronized. So for those who know me, I think it would greatly improved relations in the future, since I think this is actually the source of most of our disagreement. I have determined this to be the case in retrospect. Now I feel relieved, since this has been a great source of trouble for me.

prior to realizing this truth, I had noted my dislike for others forcing their life experience as if they were my father. ironically, patronize comes from the latin root pater "father"